"What Are You Going To Do When I Come Out?"

I posted recently about the problem I had with an evangelical friend, because she reminded me of my evangelical family--namely, my extremely judgmental, probably closeted, Uncle 'Phobe.
I wasn't sure what the exact solution was, though I knew that what I wanted was to be more open to my family about who I was. I want to able to talk about being bisexual, just as my bully of an uncle gets to talk about being straight.
I wear rainbow flag and bisexual flag pins, though lately that does not seem like enough. I doubt that anyone in my family even would recognize the bisexual flag, anyway. Most of them probably wouldn't know that there was one.
My rainbow pins may be the exact reason why he always manages to work in one snide comment about LGBT people per family visit. No one has commented on them, though I've worn them for a while. He was the exact reason I got them, in fact--because he said that gay people should "stay in the closet," and was laughing about it.
But he doesn't have to be in the closet, presuming that he is straight (he always seems very eager to provide evidence of being straight, after all...).
It was hard to think of something to say, that was actually easy to say around him. He was abusive and bullying to my cousins and me when we were children and he was older than my mom, and since then I have always feared him physically, though some times are worse than others.
I finally thought of something that might work: joking about it. Since he often jokes about his homophobia or anti-gay sentiments, maybe I should joke about being the opposite way.
The next family gathering is a long way off, and I don't know for sure what the mood will call for, but I finally found some way that I feel much more comfortable about bringing up the subject: When he makes his inevitable homophobic comments, I will crack a smile, and ask, "What are you going to do when I come out?"
If it shocks him, and makes him ask in surprise if I am a lesbian (because I don't expect he will immediately think of bisexuality), I might say, "I can't tell you that; I'm not out yet!"
If he tells me that I better not come out, I can say, "Don't worry, Uncle 'Phobe; I will NEVER tell you that I'm bisexual!"
If he wants to condemn me, I will simply say, "I have done my research, and come to a different conclusion as a Christian than you have. I don't condemn you, so you don't condemn me."
(Though I am not technically a Christian anymore, because of my doubts that God even exists, I don't feel like I'm lying there, because I know that a good god would never condemn people for the way that she made them.)
Yes, I think a lot about what he might say, based on the things that he has said, before. It's hard not to try to anticipate everything, when a small part of you is still physically afraid of someone (so much so that you bought pepper spray just to make yourself feel better about being around him).
I can't anticipate everything, no, but this is a start. By joking, I reclaim my power, in a way. I have the power, and he doesn't have the power over me. By making a joke of it, his condemnation doesn't matter.
And I don't know if my family will side with him against me (though it will probably be behind my back), or if they will buy into common stereotypes such as that LGBT people are promiscuous. But there's not much this twenty-four-year-old virgin can do about that, is there?
And trying to explain too much could bore them or make them suspicious of the very things that I'm trying to disprove. No one likes someone who so obviously has something to prove, as Uncle 'Phobe has unwittingly proven to me so many times.
So I think if I have to, I'll just explain it as, "I think both guys and girls are great--even romantically!" with a big confident smile. Why should Uncle 'Phobe's misconceptions bring me down, after all? He doesn't even know my life.
I would love to get to the point where I can simply say, "Yeah, class is going good, my animals are so funny, no cute guys or girls in my life right now, and I'm in this new play!" (because I hope to eventually get a part in a local play--if it's actually a good one, that is).
I don't know for sure if this will work, or if I will even use this new coming-out technique (though I think I will), but coming up with the idea made me feel a whole lot better. And I wanted to share it here, before I forgot to, in case someone else could use it, too.