About a month ago I attended a "community conversation" organized by a local college. The topic was Values. I expected a spirited discussion about where people derive their values, how they live their lives, or even what their values are. I was looking forward to hearing from others what they thought were the most important values to live by. I was a bit disappointed, as the topic focused mostly on the different kinds of value: financial, personal, artistic, etc, and how people see value. Fascinating in itself, though it did not tell me a lot about other people's lives and experiences.
As an atheist I have been thinking about my own values a lot lately. Many people talk about love as the ultimate value, as what makes one a moral person. I believe love has been overrated because it is too vague a term to describe one's values. A lot of people, I believe, don't know how to love others properly. Because they don't understand what love is, or what the other person needs from them, they can still end up hurting people.
I wanted to describe the ideals I value most. I thought of adding love to this list, but I now realize that this is what I believe love is, that this is the way I want to be "loved" (or treated) and try to love or treat others.
These things are what I believe we should all strive for:
1. Honesty. There is more to honesty than not telling lies. I appreciate it when people are upfront about what they want and how they feel. Though I feel it best right now not to shock most of my family with the word "atheist," I try to be honest about how I feel and what I believe about religion, when the subject comes up.
2. Empathy. Empathy is being in such a state that when others are hurting, one hurts alongside them. It is the act of putting yourself in someone else's shoes. The most difficult people to be around, the bullies and the "jerks," have little or no empathy for others. I believe lack of empathy is the cause of almost all social problems--and evil--in the world. I don't think one can be a good person without empathy for both people and animals.
3. Regard For Life. This is a natural extension of empathy, but goes beyond the point of killing an animal or person "humanely." This life may be all we have, so I think we should make sure that all of us get as much of it as possible.
Of course I am not saying that I am at all a shining example of any of these things, but these are the values that I try to live by. These are the behaviors that I believe will make the world a better place, and make our own lives better as well. Life becomes easier when you are able to be completely honest, especially to and about yourself. The world becomes friendlier when we show empathy to others (again, people and animals--caring for animals can provide a lot of pleasure to humans), and value their and our own lives. If love is indeed the highest value, then this is what I believe love is.
What do you think of this? Leave a comment below, or send me an email at: atheistjourneysblog@gmail.com
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